1.08.2011

Lack of Interest

I am, at least, sticking true to form.  When life gets a bit difficult, I have a tendency to skip writing.  The last few weeks have been no exception.  It's been a month since I posted a "Sunday Strength" and I've only written a couple of posts since the Spirit of Christmas luncheon.  December, as beautiful as it was, was rough. 

We discovered the Thursday before Christmas that a dear friend of ours had to have a lump in his neck biopsied.  He'd had a mole removed years ago that was diagnosed as melanoma but it was an isolated incident and we all thought he was 'cured.'

There are some things that make you wonder why you think.

The lump in his neck turned out to be metastatic melanoma.  Apparently, a tidbit we just learned, a diagnosis of melanoma is a "terminal" diagnosis.  It can be 20-30 years or more before it's terminal but...it's terminal.  This lump isn't isolated.  It's one of several nodules, most of which are centered on one lung. 

He starts chemo this week.  The doctor is saying 8 to 12 months but we all know what that means.  It's a target to beat.  Always. 

I heard the diagnosis and suddenly it's as if I was underwater and everyone was talking on land above me.  I don't think what I'm hearing is really sinking in, not really anyhow.  My mother's battle is "maintaining" at the moment but she'll get another CT scan in February and we'll "really" know if the cancer is being held back or if we're just kidding ourselves again.

It's like walking on eggshells set under plexiglass.  You can't be sure you're actually walking on the eggshells until one cracks and you're never sure where or when that's going to happen.

My prayer, every morning as I drive to work, every day as I drive home is "Come, Lord Jesus, Come."  An end to pain and suffering.  Please, Lord...  The thing is, I know better because that might be the end to MY pain and suffering but for so many who don't know Him, it won't only just be beginning... 

Can we all just please accept?  Believe in Christ as our Savior?  Then...God can end all of this sin and disease nonsense.

My logic feels like that of a child.  If only it would work... 


1 comment:

HeathahLee said...

When I was in my early 20's I had a beautiful friend whose mother was diagnosed with a brain tumor. As much as she was going through, I never understood her pain...until now. She once said, "I just want Jesus to come back so Mom doesn't have to suffer anymore." And of course, as the selfish 20-something I was, I thought, "No way! I wanna get married and have kids first!"

Well, had I known then what I know now, I would have fervently prayed the same thing.

My prayers are with you, your mother, and your friend, Bonnie, dear.